Author Topic: Heather Gauthier  (Read 1662 times)

Offline MrDunkelheit

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Heather Gauthier
« on: May 29, 2018, 12:58:50 AM »






Spoiler for Quote:
"If you act like prey, they'll act like predators."



Spoiler for Theme Song:





Name
Heather Gauthier

Place of Birth
Yukon, Canada

Embraced Age:
26

Age:
28

Clan
Gangrel

Religion
Agnostic

Nature
Loner
Spoiler for Info:
You are the type of person who is always alone, even in the midst of a crowd.  You are the wanderer, hunter and lone wolf. Though others might think of you as lonely, forsaken, isolated or remote, in truth you prefer your own company to that of others. There are many different reasons why this might be so: you don't understand people, you understand people too well, people dislike you, people like you too much, or you are simply lost in your own thoughts. Your reasons are your own.

Demeanor
Rogue
Spoiler for Info:
Only one thing matters to the Rogue: herself. To each his own, and if others cannot protect their claims, they have no right to them. The Rogue is not necessarily a thug or bully, however. She simply refuses to succumb to the whims of others. Rogues almost universally possess a sense of self-sufficiency. They have their own best interests in mind at all times.

Thoughts on other Supernatural

Humans: Prey.
Humans (Hunters): I really hope I don't run into one of these fanatics.
Vampires: The Damned. Pity on us.
Ghouls: Most of them are just a liability, so I'm told.
Werewolves: I'm smart enough to both fear and respect them. I know what they're capable of.
Magi: I don't like mages.
Fallen: I still don't quite understand them.
Abominations: Some of them can be very noble. After all, we share the same blood.





Spoiler for Hidden:
- Heather was raised in the Catholic Church ways, yet she's not exactly sure about God's existence anymore. You could say she developed an agnostic point of view in theological matters, which she proudly defends whenever religious matters arise - mostly out of her toxic skepticism.

-She had a rather schizoid personality since she was but a teenager; this didn't change much during her adulthood. This ought to be the main reason behind her frequent reclusion in the wilderness and her constant evasion of big groups of people.

-During her stay in the Armeé canadienne, Heather learned a lot about discipline, respect and order; she climbed her way up to the Master Corporal rank before dropping her career due to a simple lack of interest and emotional stress. During her time active she was displayed in Bosnia as part of the SFOR - this way her eyes and her flesh experienced the consquences of war, which marked her deeply in an emotional way.

-Heather suffered from alcoholism during a couple of years before she was embraced. It was starting to become a problem and it would have most likely brought a premature death upon her.

-Her childhood was blessed only with a single but real friendship. She considered Avery, a girl about her age, her best and only friend, but the relationship between them turned distant when Heather left her native Whitehorse to join the army. It was her who gave Heather the beanie hat she still uses back in her twelveth birthday.

-Heather has English as her native tongue, yet living in Canada during basically most of her life taught her fluent and almost flawless French.

-After Avery's (who was also pregnant) death by the hand of the Sabbat, Heather lost further faith in Humanity and also in whatever vampiric society she could belong to - after all, being a vampire herself was the cause of this tragedy. It is very likely that she won't ever forgive herself because of that, and it surely paid its toll on her psyche and behaviour.

-A long period of introspective thought has brought Heather to a dark acceptance of what she truly is, yet she's willing to keep up the fight for as long as she's able to. All in all, she has grown more reclusive, animalistic and bestial in nature; on the other hand, the current mental state in which she fell isn't making things any easier. Heather is, in all ways, an unstable and unpredictable animal - a time bomb that might explode sooner or later.







[ooo] - Enemy: Dislike, distrust, hate.
[ooo] - Impartial: No relation, ambiguous ties.
[ooo] - Friendly: Decent, allies, friends.
[ooo] - Extremely Friendly: Family, close friends.
[ooo] - Love Interest




Alice Gauthier - I wish the old Heather made you proud at some point. I wonder... do you actually miss me?

Alexandre Gauthier - I'd give everything away to have you back, to have myself back. But for now, stay the fuck away from me - forever.




Isaac Wylcoff - It's a real shame that you became this egotistical, megalomaniac self-proclaimed hero of the species out of an obvious lust for power. Love is nothing but a drag, and you're weak if you really intend to rely on it to carry on with your existence; it won't make you less of a monster, and it certainly won't set you apart from what I am. Too bad I'm compelled to feel you, no matter what. Being cursed twice now is something I'll get used to eventually... or not.

Ansgar Aarseth - Why would you choose one such as me? I might never get a proper answer to that question, but I'm grateful to some extent... A curse is a curse, no matter how good it makes you feel. For as long as I carry on with my unlife, I'll do honor to your teachings - even if I'm not the strongest warrior out there.

Marcus Nadler - What is making you feel so drawn towards me? Powerful, high-class and resourceful - all things that I'm not. I won't be confused or fooled again, as I'm willing to keep my freedom intact... and my thoughts clean.

Lilia Mayes - I can't believe they drew you in... I'm not taking any chances.

Brad Carson - Too clever and introspective; that's usually a good thing, but it might as well drive someone uncomfortble.




Avery Bouchard - [Deceased] Why you of all people? I will never forgive myself. Never.





04/12/1999
Spoiler for Hidden:

Been a long while, and a lot has happened. I don't get the chance to plaster my thoughts on these pages very often anymore, but I'm willing to give it a shot. It is a great mistake to let these flashes of insight slide right through my fingers, wouldn't you agree?

Having a small shine of ludicity is almost rare for me at this point, and it only happens when I get to be entirely alone in my comfort zone: the pines. It is very possible that I'm compelled to be such an schizoid bitch for the rest of my existence, but I really like it a lot - and I mean it. The sound of swaying branches and nocturnal predators is almost as tender as those old songs I used to listen to while laying on my favorite spot, near the river outside Whitehorse. Such thoughts fill my heart with both nostalgia and sorrow, even if I slowly learned how to ignore the latter, which isn't a really difficult task once you manage to accept your twisted and fucked up nature, is it?

At some point, somehow, I started to accept the true nature of what I've become during the last years, the animal I've been forced to put together out of sheer instinct and a slight pinch of cynism, which has driven me to feel careless as the guilt weights less and less heavy on my conscience while I eagerly grant both my body and my soul to a monster that lurks somewhere in the darkest corners of my being. I really can't make sense of any of it, no matter how hard I try to justify some of my actions or some of the courses my mind has taken during the last months, but I've jumped in the conclusion that I simply stopped caring at all.

That girl whom I once shared laughter, joy, special times and honesty with, she now lays dead somewhere; my condition and the subsequent burdens that are tied to it got her killed and gutted open like an animal - and, with her, all of my last bits of faith have died. I don't think about it too often anymore. If any of the things I was taught were true, if somehow some deity was watching over us with the most tender of all cares... Then why would He allow such things to happen? Why should the innocent die by the hand of the foul and the wretched? Perhaps morality is at question here, perhaps it simply doesn't make any sense at all and means no more than all of those half-assed illusions we're taught to believe in since we're children. Morality might be the biggest load of horse shit I've ever known.

I'm a monster, and I shouldn't waste my time pretending I'm not. A lot precious of time was already wasted in that ugly shell I like to call denial. As any monster, I'm better off away from those I might harm - I enjoy feasting on life, after all.

Perhaps this is all I'd like to express for now.


07/12/1999
Spoiler for Hidden:

The silence has become deafening, and the tranquility became progressively maddening. The urges keep roaring within me and it's getting harder and harder to quell this anger efficiently; I've said before that times of lucidity have become precious to me, providing of some insight when dealing with this... odd issues I'm going through right now.

Monstrosity comes as natural to me as breathing once was, and so does the subsequent carnage I'm always so clumsily trying to avoid. The sour taste of blood becomes sweeter and sweeter as this thing takes over of all my thoughts, as its claws viciously clutch around my body, trying to mark me as its property - my face, my hands and my skin are covered with vestiges of its nature. Virtually, I became a monster.

Am I even trying to fight this twisted nature back or am I slowly growing fond to it? That's the question that troubles me the most lately, and I get a sharp headache by only thinking about it for more than ten minutes. However, I'll be blunt here: Does it even matter whether I get overwhelmed by this thing at the end or not? Wouldn't that be my ultimate fate anyways? Won't this beast dominate and beat me entirely into submission at some point? Oh, I'm eager to find out. Why am I troubling my mind with these thoughts so often now? As I said earlier: it's just a matter of time before I explode. I guess it's just the waiting that has me on my knees right now.

I still remember that first time, that day when I drained this explorer back in Oregon, how his frail life slipped through my fingers in about thirty seconds - the expression and the emptiness in his eyes when I finally dropped his lifeless corpse before me, along with the last drops of his sweet blood tainting the soothing snow.

I remember this time when I caught that little fucking thief trying to steal my bike - how good it felt to rip his throat out with my fangs, creating a doughy, thick pool of blood beneath my hiking boots. Again, the same horrified expression embodied upon his face like a statue... that expression I somehow started to enjoy overtime.

I can also recall that time when I ripped that biologist's intestines out with my bare hands, just for the sake of survival and self-preservation. Was it really necessary to give him such a gruesome and terrifying death? Couldn't it been way more easy just to put a bullet in his head or slit his throat to avoid unnecessary suffering? It is most likely, but something pushed me into making a freak show out of him anyways.

All of these things? I can't relate any of them to my old self, and this is what terrifies me the most. It's almost as if I no longer cared... yet something deep inside my soul still struggles to this very day to fuck that beast over. I'm unsure of which wolf will eventually gut the other one open, but things aren't looking pretty thus far.

I've got things to set my mind on right now, so perhaps I'll just forget about this for a while. Nice therapy.


20/12/1999
Spoiler for Hidden:

Love as a whole is meaningless and absurd, isn't that right? We spend many nights trying to figure out a reason to feel better, to feel comfortable with ourselves and to make this unlife somewhat more bearable. Perhaps the scariest thing about existence itself is being unable to find your place in the world, struggling like a caged animal in order to find some half-assed purpose that keeps you going a few more inches before you finally colapse and die on the grass. How poetic.

I seriously wonder what's the point of wasting time in such a trifle, and I also ask to myself why do others try to hide their natures doing the same exact thing, over and over. Perhaps "someone" has such a big, uncontrollable ego and needs a female figure by his side to feel big and important - some may be that tamable. I learned my lesson, and I don't intend to look back; I don't intend to be under some megalomaniac's leash anymore. He might need this constant supply of ego to sustain his unlife, and this leads me to feel very bad about the poor, unfortunate soul that crosses paths with him in times to come. Humilliation, retracted urges, overall sadness and degrading treatment is something I'm not willing to undergo any further - not by him, not by anyone.

Independence and freedom surely feels good at times. So does resentment and hate, I've got to admit.


24/12/1999
Spoiler for Hidden:

It's half past eleven P.M., and Christmas is around the corner.

I went through Angel Pine a few hours ago, just to sense some of that joy and happiness people down there are irradiating. The music, the smell, the joyful laughter of little children excited about presents. It's a mesmerizing sensation, I've got to admit, as I was surely drawn to get close and stay there for a while, listening and feeling it to the bone - It just makes me feel at home, what can I say? They love Christmas and winter as a whole back at Whitehorse. I'm actually wondering how is my family doing up there right now, if they think of me during these holidays as much as I'm thinking of them right now; I'm their only daughter, after all... Well, was.

Right now I'm sitting on a mountain, feeling those winter chills down my spine each time the wind decides to blow in my direction, swaying those heavy branches on the pines as well; it's a shame that we don't have those Northern Lights down here in California, as it was a true mesmerizing experience to have when you're alone with your own thoughts in such an "inhospitable" place like this. I used to run away from home during this time of the year just to take a peek at them for a while... sometimes with Avery as my companion. We would just lay there on the snow to stare at those beautiful colors for hours and hours, uttering not a single word as we didn't even deemed it necessary; those moments were special enough, they were small experiences that needn't of chit-chat or some other bullshit. Perhaps having each other under those magical lights was far more significant than any other thing that I have had. For some reason, Christmas reminds me of this.

Fucking hell. I'm willing to trust that age will make me forget many things for my own sake. Three years have passed, and this ain't getting any less painful.

« Last Edit: September 20, 2018, 05:55:19 PM by MrDunkelheit »
"The fear of blood tends to create fear for the flesh"

Offline MrDunkelheit

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Re: Heather Gauthier
« Reply #1 on: May 29, 2018, 12:59:10 AM »
This copyrighted format was stolen from Heller.
« Last Edit: June 23, 2018, 09:58:33 AM by MrDunkelheit »
"The fear of blood tends to create fear for the flesh"

Offline Jeffrey Gain

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Re: Heather Gauthier
« Reply #2 on: May 29, 2018, 01:13:15 AM »
Dislikes criminals they are all vermin, yet hangs out and likes a gang that basically kills anyone that endangers the Masquerade.

Love the cp tho, seems promising as a character.
[22:52:01] Male_1802_4246 says [Radio]: Drink from glass bottles, people, don't let those femminist jews take you down!

[22:53:01] Male_1802_4246 says [Radio]: Stick to your masculinity, don't turn soft on me! Don't turn soft on AMERICA!

[22:53:28] Male_1802_4246 says [Radio]: Well I'm not even fucking american but patriotism is usually the fastest way to make most of you actually listen to me.

Offline MrDunkelheit

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Re: Heather Gauthier
« Reply #3 on: May 29, 2018, 01:15:45 AM »
Dislikes criminals they are all vermin, yet hangs out and likes a gang that basically kills anyone that endangers the Masquerade.

Love the cp tho, seems promising as a character.

killing dabi doesnt count as killing tho))
"The fear of blood tends to create fear for the flesh"

Offline Heller

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Re: Heather Gauthier
« Reply #4 on: May 29, 2018, 01:56:14 AM »
Quote
(( Dislikes criminals they are all vermin, yet hangs out and likes a gang that basically kills anyone ))

The difference between what we do and what criminals do is we perform a murder as a last resort to protect the masquerade. You don't need to go around saying such things when you barely know the whole truth.

Anyway, dope character and good development. Keep going.
"In psytrance we trust."



Quote from: Raven Corella
Yeah. I know aaall about your 'blood fights' with Heather.

Offline Arther99

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Re: Heather Gauthier
« Reply #5 on: May 29, 2018, 02:02:42 AM »
 I like it

Offline Raven Corella

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Re: Heather Gauthier
« Reply #6 on: May 29, 2018, 02:08:19 AM »
:p -> -> -> (  . ) ( .  )


nice cp 8)

Offline Jeffrey Gain

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Re: Heather Gauthier
« Reply #7 on: May 29, 2018, 02:09:32 AM »
Quote
(( Dislikes criminals they are all vermin, yet hangs out and likes a gang that basically kills anyone ))

The difference between what we do and what criminals do is we perform a murder as a last resort to protect the masquerade.


*Human hears noise at the gym, Human see's whats up, see's two people stabbing a guy moving like The Flash*
*Two people notice, capture human and kill him, not even considering taking him hostage for a certain amount of time till they find a mind altering person or perhaps ghoulfying him.*

last resort

I was just joking my dawg but I'll gladly show the hypocrisy.
« Last Edit: May 29, 2018, 02:13:29 AM by Jeffrey Gain »
[22:52:01] Male_1802_4246 says [Radio]: Drink from glass bottles, people, don't let those femminist jews take you down!

[22:53:01] Male_1802_4246 says [Radio]: Stick to your masculinity, don't turn soft on me! Don't turn soft on AMERICA!

[22:53:28] Male_1802_4246 says [Radio]: Well I'm not even fucking american but patriotism is usually the fastest way to make most of you actually listen to me.

Offline MrDunkelheit

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Re: Heather Gauthier
« Reply #8 on: May 29, 2018, 02:39:13 AM »
no need to turn my cp into a warzone pls
"The fear of blood tends to create fear for the flesh"

Offline Darkness

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Re: Heather Gauthier
« Reply #9 on: May 29, 2018, 02:40:34 AM »
nice

Offline Heller

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Re: Heather Gauthier
« Reply #10 on: May 29, 2018, 02:41:51 AM »
Quote
(( Dislikes criminals they are all vermin, yet hangs out and likes a gang that basically kills anyone ))

The difference between what we do and what criminals do is we perform a murder as a last resort to protect the masquerade.


*Human hears noise at the gym, Human see's whats up, see's two people stabbing a guy moving like The Flash*
*Two people notice, capture human and kill him, not even considering taking him hostage for a certain amount of time till they find a mind altering person or perhaps ghoulfying him.*

last resort

I was just joking my dawg but I'll gladly show the hypocrisy.

uh, i've used presence on most of the ppl and taken them to catherine for a memory wipe as have most of my members. there's still a handful who would rather kill them due to their nature (or maybe they were ex sabbat or smth or their humanity is low, thats simply what they wanna portray). only time i've killed a human or two was when there was noone who could wipe their memories and those that simply put other vampires in danger of the masq. idk who ur trying to show is being a hypocrite, but if ur trying to say im one, ur dead wrong mate.

no need to turn my cp into a warzone pls

gotcha
"In psytrance we trust."



Quote from: Raven Corella
Yeah. I know aaall about your 'blood fights' with Heather.

Offline Fahim

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Re: Heather Gauthier
« Reply #11 on: May 29, 2018, 03:09:21 AM »
"Faris Dhager"

You murdered the spelling lmao.

Offline $hadow

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Re: Heather Gauthier
« Reply #12 on: May 29, 2018, 04:31:25 AM »
Pretty nice

Offline MrDunkelheit

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Re: Heather Gauthier
« Reply #13 on: May 29, 2018, 05:33:34 AM »
"Faris Dhager"

You murdered the spelling lmao.

fixed ay

Still adding stuff, though. Thanks for the comments.
"The fear of blood tends to create fear for the flesh"

Offline Maid

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Re: Heather Gauthier
« Reply #14 on: May 29, 2018, 07:59:08 AM »
this is real cool gl!